Thursday, October 16, 2008

A Poem of a Poatish Predicament

Here is proof I can rhyme:

The Problem with Poats

Listen, my readers, and you shall hear
A gruesome tale void of cheer.
Twas afternoon and through the house
Was heard the clicking of keyboard and mouse.
It was the evil twins, chatting away,
That one fatal, singular day.
When on one private message,
One twin did not see what she wrote,
Thought it was "post," but in fact twas "poat,"
And the other twin was appalled,
For that is a mistake most insidious,
A poat is a creature most hideous,
And always comes when called.

Humans are its favorite feast,
It eats you while you're still alive,
Few there are who will survive
an attack by this awful beast.
There is no possible way to destroy it,
And only two ways to annoy it.
One is a torch that is lit,
And the other, sneezing in a fit.

Now the twins had a hunch,
That the poat on them would munch,
So off they did quickly scurry,
With the poat following in a hurry.
Bridget had a book of matches,
And she managed to set Sara on fire,
But it did no good 'gainst the poat.
Some pepper couldn't make a sneeze,
So they scrambled up two trees.
Sara was still a-burning,
And the poat was quickly learning
How to climb a tree,
So again the twins did flee.
Sara gave Bridget a hug,
For she was mad at being set aflame,
Bridget caught fire, both jumped in a river,
And the poat, on it came.

Bridget was nearly drowned,
For Sara had turned her upside-down
In the river, with an intent to kill,
And the poat came down the hill.
When suddenly, a pouce they did see
Looking wild, and noble and free,
On the breeze its hair did float,
As it charged upon the poat.

Now a pouce is a solitary thing,
Inclined to quiet pondering,
But the sight of a poat being rude
Puts it in a foul mood,
And it invariably kills it.

Sara stopped scowling
While the pouce was busy disemboweling,
And she set Bridget the right way (up).
"Sorry I tried to kill you," she did say,
And Bridget replied, "Its okay."

And the pouce was happy
Cause the poat was dead,
The twins were happy because they weren't
(Even though they were half burnt);
Thus ended the mishap(py),
(And if you must say "more,"
We request you say, "Mordor.")


Lady Merilwen said...

=) Great poem my dear! I shudder to think at how close you both came to death. Thank heavens for that pounce!

~ Auntie Rose

Lady Merilwen said...

Why are we supposed to say Mordor?

Lanta - haven't done the tale of Soyousay yet, but I did write about the elopment!

Angel_Horses said...

ROTFL Bridget! Great job! :D

Yes, Lady Rose, Pouces are quite invaluable to our daily lives, though we often do not realize it!

And we're not gonna explain about the Mordor bit just yet. You'll just have to trust us, because, BELIEVE ME, it is IMPORTANT!

Well, hurry up! =P

Kitty Cat said...

Thank you, Rose and Sara. :D

ROFL, the elopement post was hilarious. But you didn't credit me with the original idea. =P

Raewyn said...

*sqeaks* EEEHHHPP!! I'M SORRY, LANTA!!!!!!!! *showers with hugs* There. Better? Please don't be too mad! *smiles hopefuly* I'm popping over right now! *scurries over*

I'M COMING, I'M COMING! No need to send a poat (whatever that is!)!

Aw, thank you my dearest Evil cousin for being so understanding! *hugs again* cousin is turning 5 tomorrow so there's a huge party. Pretty sure I shall be camera happy, so expect pictures when I get back!

*blows kisses*

Raewyn said...

LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNTAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! AND KIIIIITY!!!! WELCOME!!!!! I'm so, so, SO happy you two got a blog! *hugs both tightly*

Wow! *giggles* And what, may I ask, does a poat look like? How on earth did you two set your adventures to rhyme? *tries to look intelligent* Did it take a while?

Really, really funny and very good! You guys should send it in to a magazine or something!

It's right up there with 'The Cow jumped Over the Moon' as Frodo fatelly recited in the Prancing Pony, if not better! *gasps and covers her mouth at her Tolkien blasphemny*


Kitty Cat said...

*blinks* That was rather hyper.

*blushes* It didn't take me all that long, once I got on a roll it went pretty quick. *gasps* Up there with Tolkien? :O My goodness.

We now have an artist's rendition of both types of poats and a pouce! A new post will be made quickly.

Angel_Horses said...

Grace, you appear to be nearly (or, in fact, maybe even more) excitable than I am :P
However, I am thrilled that you popped in! :D *hugs back*

Raewyn said...

*flutters eyelids* But of course my dears...I am Grace, am I not? Young, cute, highly hyper and bubbly. ;)

Well, you were "WAAHHHH!!"-ing over on my blog, so I thought if I replied in caps as well, it'd make you feel better! :)

Angel_Horses said...

Haha! Yup :)

Haha, I knew it would work! Lol. My evil plots ALWAYS work =P

Rosebud said...

i am veddy scared of poats now!